My liberation story through Yoga...

It took me 20 years of being married to believe my husband loved me. 20 years. As I've unraveled trauma work through my life I have realized the deep belief that I am unworthy of love. And how could I have not come to that conclusion considering my mother was a narcissist. I was an extension of her, and existed (in her mind) only to serve her. Individualism was not encouraged. Add to that, I was raised Christian and was constantly told how bad I was. That my heart was untrustworthy, and my thoughts did not please God. This was a great recipe for self esteem issues!

I then spent the next 20 years trying to earn my place with him. Prove I'm loveable. Now, if I was doing this with the person I live with, can you imagine how much I was doing this with others in my life? Be the good mother. Be the good friend. Be the good Christian. Be the good employee. Be the good wife. Be the wife church told you to be because he's the leader and that what he needs, that what God wants. It's interesting that I felt so moved by the words taught to me, "Do not be conformed to the patterns of this world...". That's exactly what I did...conformed.

As I've practiced Yoga, my connection to myself (and therefore the Divine Spirit that feeds me), I would gain self knowledge that helped me make small changes to learn to trust myself. The skill that never got cultivated as a child. I learned to trust everyone else around me, but not me. My yoga practice allowed me a holy space to "practice" just that. Trust where the next breath takes you and know you'll be cared for there.

I'm starting a 10 week series leading up to Labor Day on the ways awareness have helped me shift and act so that I am living the most liberated version available to me at any moment. I'm no one special. You can do it too. You may just need some tools to assist you along the way. Sign up for my newsletter here and come on this weekly journey with me. I'm happy to share all I've learned.

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Looking forward to connecting!